I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
