I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
