are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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