jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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