He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
