I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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