I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
did i just pee glitter
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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