I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
Randomize