I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize