Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
