Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize