Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
We have so much sex to catch up on
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
