Acid is not a monday night drug
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
His nipple licking is glorious
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