the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
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