I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
