When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
