i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
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