Nicole vs. Life
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize