no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
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I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
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I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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