We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize