plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
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