Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
