If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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