Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
