the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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