Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
