There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Randomize