I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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