ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Randomize
