my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize