Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
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All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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