shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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