does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
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