Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
