Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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