The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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