he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize