Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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