Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
