Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
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I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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