I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
jump out the window naked night went bad
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