No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
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