I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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