Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(312): View more from Illinois

dude, your ex-bf is on match.com

(847): View more from Illinois

details on that.

(312): View more from Illinois

well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.

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(312): dude, your ex-bf is on match.com (847): details on that. (312): well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes. http://tfl.nu/50kk

Replies (6) Good night (2073) Bad night (900)
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(714): View more from California

Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?

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(714): Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix? http://tfl.nu/0vla

Replies (153) Good night (3563) Bad night (1209)
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(585): View more from New York

Congratulations on your moose knuckle.

(614): View more from Ohio

Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.

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(585): Congratulations on your moose knuckle. (614): Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated. http://tfl.nu/9z1g

Replies (7) Good night (2821) Bad night (802)
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(252): View more from North Carolina

I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.

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(252): I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME. http://tfl.nu/1mf6

Replies (94) Good night (18318) Bad night (2805)
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(401): View more from Rhode Island

after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.

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(401): after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome. http://tfl.nu/gm5a

Replies (25) Good night (5778) Bad night (1308)
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(309): View more from Illinois

so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....

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(309): so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower.... http://tfl.nu/5ddp

Replies (14) Good night (1162) Bad night (4248)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.

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(+44): Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man. http://tfl.nu/2h1j

Replies (5) Good night (3289) Bad night (979)
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(631): View more from New York

He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.

(205): View more from Alabama

I hate freshman.

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(631): He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them. (205): I hate freshman. http://tfl.nu/44or

Replies (23) Good night (1887) Bad night (5295)
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(330): View more from Ohio

i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.

(614): View more from Ohio

My vagina agrees.

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(330): i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again. (614): My vagina agrees. http://tfl.nu/ii41

Replies (20) Good night (6226) Bad night (828)
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(775): View more from Nevada

He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.

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(775): He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had. http://tfl.nu/a3aj

Replies (13) Good night (3578) Bad night (1692)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer

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(+44): We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer http://tfl.nu/3muy

Replies (6) Good night (1191) Bad night (532)
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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.

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(814): I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before. http://tfl.nu/yjkb

Replies (2) Good night (1075) Bad night (377)
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(815): View more from Illinois

Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..

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(815): Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won.. http://tfl.nu/wk4z

Replies (6) Good night (1417) Bad night (397)
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(919): View more from North Carolina

I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?

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(919): I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright? http://tfl.nu/bgy5

Replies (1) Good night (759) Bad night (351)
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(355): View more from

He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat

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(355): He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat http://tfl.nu/brov

Replies (5) Good night (704) Bad night (369)

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