The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
No...this little piggys going to the bar
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Randomize
