His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
P.S. I can't hear my feet
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Randomize
