If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Randomize
