Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Randomize