Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
