with your own penis?
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Two words: nipple clamps
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